I think I made a mistake

I picked up my dress from Jenny Yoo yesterday. They don't do alterations, so I had to go to an outside tailor. A friend of mine who works in fashion recommended Joseph Ting at Dynasty Custom Tailors, which is just a few blocks from Jenny Yoo. Joseph and Dynasty were also recommended by New York magazine's wedding guide, a source that I trust because it caters to rich people, and rich people don't play when it comes to their wedding stuff.

Anyhow, even though my wedding is not til December, I was excited to pick up my dress, and I didn't want to schlep it all the way home on the subway, and then back to Joseph again on the subway at some later date. I said, "let's do it now!"

I put the dress on and loved it even more than I did before. It seemed a little big though, which I was psyched about since I lost 5 pounds. But then I remembered that I want to lose 5 more, and the wedding isn't for four months, and Joseph isn't going to require multiple fittings. I was thinking that after this, that would be it. I would take it home and store it in my in-laws' closet until December.

Now I am thinking: do I have to stay the exact weight I am for the next four months so the dress fits? It is strapless, so I really can't fool around and risk it falling off. The sample I tried in the store really fit quite well, so these alterations are not an elaborate multi-fitting process. Joseph is just shortening it, and nipping it in around the torso for a snugger fit, and that's that.

I'm a little nervous. My wonderful friend Amy, who came with me, says, "Don't worry about it, if we need to go back in November, we go back in November. No big deal."

So I guess I just won't worry. Joseph will still be there (and he works fast; this is supposed to be done in a week) and I can go back if I have to. I just feel like I planned badly, and I hate that! Usually, I am a good planner. Rats!

lift 'em up, push 'em together!

I got a call last week that my dress is in! Last week, I know, I know. I can't believe it's just sitting there. But I had two important things to do before I could go pick it up. First, I had to find a tailor, which I have done. Second, I had to get my undergarments.

I am a big fan of What Not to Wear, and it was there that I first heard of the wonders of getting professionally fitted for a bra. I really hate bra shopping, and I always feel like I am buying the wrong thing, so I was psyched to learn that there are ladies out there who are experts at making my ladies look good.

In New York City, there are a few places you can go. WNTW used Linda the Bra Lady, who I have heard terrific things about. Online research led me to Bra*Tenders, however. Bra*Tenders is located near Times Square and the Theater District, and it is the go-to place for theater people. (Miss Star, am I right?) They got great reviews on Yelp.com, as well as on the wedding blogs.

You have to make an appointment, and they take your credit card over the phone. If you miss your appointment without calling to cancel, they charge you. Yikes! But the appointment system, as well as their commitment to it, really makes the experience and service top-notch.

Bra*Tenders isn't a storefront, it is on the 6th floor of an office building with a totally amazing Art Deco interior. I was buzzed in, and because I was early, superfriendly Crystal offered me candy and a magazine, and the chance to go to the bathroom (a girl after my own heart!). When she was ready for me, we went together into a dressing room that was about the size of a small New York City bedroom (kidding, sort of...). I brought a picture of me in my wedding dress, in which I was feeling a little droopy, to say the least.

She had me take off my shirt, and I said, "I'd like to lift 'em up. I want a little something going on, but not too va-va-voom."

"Yes," she said, "and we'll push them together, because you're hanging to the side." And then she pushed them together.

OK, then!

We decided on my size. I have always bought 34B, but recently started experimenting with 32C. Turns out I am a 32C. Hey, that's why straps always fall off my shoulder! Already, Bra*Tenders was worth it. She determined my size by trying a 32C bra that was absolutely lovely and made me look goooooood. I glanced at the price tag. Oh, this is what a $120 bra does for you!

Because the sweetheart neckline and the back of the dress dip low, she said I would need a bustier longline bra. She brought it in, and then asked me if I would consider wearing Spanx. I was hoping to not wear Spanx, but I decided to put myself in the hands of the expert. "Well, we can try it, I guess...." I said.

Then she told me that the longline bra would cause all my stuff to smoosh out the bottom and make a gross muffin top at my hips. By all means then, bring on the Spanx!

Putting them on was unpleasant, because I hate the feeling of squeezing my thighs and behind into something tight. But once it was on, it was all good. The bustier was lovely and arranged everything just so. Crystal was right, everything was totally smooth across my hips. By this point, I was totally used to the Spanx and planning what outfits I would wear them with.

I was so excited by how great Crystal was making me look that I allowed her to upsell me. Usually I buy my bras from Calvin Klein at Macy's on sale. I told her this, and she didn't have any good Calvin Klein for me, but she had some other plain-looking but totally flattering nude colored bra for $44. I said, "I'll take it!"

I should note that I didn't feel any pressure whatsoever to buy. Crystal was really kind and made me feel good and comfortable. Bra*Tenders is the kind of place that really caters to women of all shapes and sizes, and helps you feel good about yourself. Work with what you got, I say! (This is also the idea behind WNTW, I might add.)

They had a lot of camisoles that were autographed by famous people, and I was glad to see one from Gloria Steinem that said something like, "Thanks for making a great space for women." I felt just the same way.

The bill was $200, for the spanx, longline, and regular bra. The consultation, which was at least 30-40 minutes, does not cost extra. I love good customer service, and I totally got it at Bra*Tenders.

Now I am superpsyched to do my dress fitting! I am also superpsyched that I am getting married in the winter, because although Crystal was wearing Spanx, I just don't know about that during the summer.

How did you go about buying under-the-dress-wear? Did you wing it on your own, do internet research or have a consultation at a store?

Dress dramarama

In my approved pre-engagement internet research, I discovered that J. Crew does weddings, and I decided straight away that I wanted a J. Crew wedding. J. Crew is the greatest, and I do love checking things off the list. Wedding dress and bridesmaids dresses from the same place, available online? Perf!

I also have three personality quirks that make the proposition of wedding dress shopping a total nightmare for me:
1) I hate trying on.
2) I get overwhelmed by too many choices (I don't even like long menus in restaurants!).
3) I am more of a "good enough" girl than a "this has to be PERFECT!" girl.

I had already fished around on the J. Crew website and found a bunch of dresses that I liked. Once we actually were engaged, I got my mom on the phone and managed to navigate her onto the website so we could shop online together. We picked the Sabine gown in about 10 minutes, and were done.


I went to work the next day, beaming to the girls about how only weeks after getting engaged, I had the venue and the dress. Man, I thought I had all my ducks in a row. Who said planning a wedding is hard?

The dress came only four days after ordering it, which was very exciting. Even more exciting was the lovely, giant box with a lovely, giant bow in which the dress arrived. My recently-wed friend Rosemary came over and helped me try it on.

Once in the dress, I wasn't so sure. It looked a little too homecoming queen for me. There was something about the fabric that just overwhelmed me and made me feel like I was drowning in ivory taffeta. Rosemary fussed over me and gave advice on how a tailor could nip it in here or there, we'd get it steamed, and everything would be great. She took pictures for me to send to my mom and maid of honor. When I looked at the pictures, I felt like the dress was very unflattering and just not at all how I had hoped to look.

I was very committed to the J. Crew idea, though, and I became stubborn. I had it in my head that I would have a J. Crew wedding, and by God, I was going to do it!

Fortunately, I got a grip a few days later. I realized I have months 'til the wedding and I can do whatever I want, and I don't have to wear this dress, and there is no reason to have a dress that is just good-enough. With the encouragement of two girlfriends and my mom, I decided that I would take the dress back. Now it is hard to believe I was even considering settling. It's embarassing!

In May, my maid of honor, my mom and my fiance's sister went with me to Jenny Yoo, who also has classic, chic and affordable gowns. I tried on ten gowns, LOVED four of them, and ended up buying the first one I tried on (which is chiffon; I did learn that taffeta does not look good on me!).

It was totally easy -- we were done in like an hour. (The only difficult thing was getting my girls to pay attention to me! The studio was running a 75% off sale on cashmere sweaters, and everytime I came out of the dressing room, they were browsing sweaters. Jerks!)

I still think J. Crew is a fantastic option, and I am really glad they have gotten into the bridal business. I have seen gorgeous pictures of real weddings in which the bride wore this J. Crew, polka dot gown, and it was a knockout!


The dress just wasn't for me. Also, I need to slow down and be careful about my decision-making!

Has anyone out there bought a wedding dress off the internet?