Wednesday, July 8, 2009

"I prefer a more accelerated schedule" -- The pre-engagement

G. and I had been together for three years, and we were both over 30. Not that that matters, but it kinda did to me (much as I hate to admit it). After about two years, I was ready to get engaged, but I could see that he wasn't. Not because he didn't love me, we had for sure made the committment to each other; we had long-term-planning talks all the time. I knew he needed to work out some stuff in his head first, though.

Last summer, we went to Europe. One night in England, after about three dozen pints, I had a totally embarrassing meltdown while walking home from the pub. I don't remember what I said, but I think it was something along the lines of "Why haven't we gotten engaged yet, what the hell is going on, this is driving me nuts, blah blah blah" with some extra special drunken melodrama thrown in.

Believe you me, I never wanted to get to that point. And when I was sober, I didn't actually feel so desperate about the whole situation at all.

He responded with something like, "This isn't what I signed up for when we agreed to go on this vacation, so cool it."

The next day, the next two days, the next week, I felt terrible. He told me not to worry about it, but I totally did. I was so ashamed and just really felt pathetic. I left it alone after that.

Six months later, we had our three month anniversary. We went to River Cafe, which is this super fancy, super expensive restaurant that we can't by any stretch of the imagination afford.

River Cafe night is when we usually have big talks. It was at our one-year anniversary at River Cafe when G. first said, "Say, we should get married at some point."

So this time, our third, he proposed.

A schedule.

He was like, "Let's get engaged in 2009, and married in 2010." The wine was flowing, I was wearing sequins, things were good. So I was all, "Sure! Sounds great!" Clink of the glasses. A discussion of the ring, and our future babies' names (seriously).*

The next morning, I reconsidered. I tap tap tapped him on the shoulder the moment I woke up:

"I prefer a more accelerated schedule with the getting engaged thing. How about, get engaged in 2009, married in 2009. We've been together three years, enough is enough. Let's get 'er done."

He was like, "OK, sounds good."

So then I just had to wait. Oh yeah, and deal with the ring thing (more on that, soon!).

*He totally forgot the baby-name discussion. He now has no memory of it!

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